A lesson in husbandry, and no I don't mean the animals

Marriage is tough. I love it, but it's tough. What's even harder is having a baby, both working full time jobs, both taking classes, and still finding time to converse between shouts to the toddler that "that's hot, oweee" and "eww, that's yucky, don't touch!"

But really, men. Really? Raise your hand if you think it's effective to yell, bark, scream orders to your wife because you're tired/hungry/stressed/being an asshole. Husband, put your hand down.

I wouldn't call myself a disobedient wife. I truly love to serve my husband the way I believe a wife should; I like to have dinner ready for him when he gets home on the chance that I have a day off, I regularly check to make sure he's not wearing stained or dirty pants, and I'm sort of type A when it comes to keeping the living room, kitchen and front room clean (to hell with the back rooms, I'm not superwoman!). I balance our very unbalanced budget. I am almost the sole caretaker of our child as I make sure he's fed, clean, wiped, played with, rested...you name it, I do it. I pack Adrian's lunches. Make sure he's awake and out of bed for work.

 If I decide ONE day, that I'm going to have dinner with my parents and not go straight home while he's at school, I think I'm entitled to it. If I don't answer his fourth call within ten minutes, so sue me. If I call him back and he's mad for some unapparent reason and hangs up on me, not my problem. If I don't bring him dinner home because I assumed he went to class and was planning on cooking him dinner but really he skipped class and has been sitting on his ass waiting for me to come home and he's still starving, he's an idiot.

But if he thinks that he can take his stress out on me, try to make me feel like his work problems are mine because he has to go to El Centro at 2:30am (which really didn't happen until 5:30am) since I wasn't at the house to get something for some guy who stopped by, tell me that I'm really fucking pissing him off right now, AND THEN TELL ME TO GET MY ASS IN THE KITCHEN, he has another thing comin'.


This wife doesn't play that game.


To defend him just a very, VERY tiny bit, I think he was trying on his big boy pants by telling me to get my ass in the kitchen. He's never said those words to me and hopefully if he wants to keep me and his balls intact, he'll never say it again. Needless to say, that tough guy thing really doesn't do it for me. I laughed in his face, told him no, and that if he wanted even a bowl of cereal from my kitchen, he had some major apologizing and sweet talking to do. As always, he and his pride slunk off into the bedroom without a peep, trying to rest up for his 2:30am appointment with the 8 east freeway.

You can bet at 5:00am when I woke his ass up after sleeping through his alarm he was reaaaaaaaaal grateful.