When in doubt, brag about your child

There hasn't been anything extremely exciting going on in our world aside from massive amounts of work, school and being extremely busy with our baby. Unfortunately, a combination of exhaustion and stress leaves me lacking creativity in composing interesting and thought provoking posts. Instead, I just thought I'd talk about Baby Gabe and how awesome he is.

He is currently saying so many words, there is no way to keep track.

He speaks in full sentences.

Right now he is obsessed with the books Hungry Little Caterpillar and Elmo Goes Potty - we read them about thirty times a day.

He is utterly obsessed with fruit snacks.

When he goes to bed every night, we say a prayer and he finishes it by saying "Amen!" Then he puts Elmo and his monkey to sleep next to him with a blankie. 

Thankfully, his favorite movie has switched from Monsters, Inc. to Despicable Me.

In one month from Tuesday, he will be turning 2; I still have no idea what we are going to do for a party, though I think we're leaning towards having it at our house.

Lately, he has been telling other people "I love mommy and daddy," and that just about bursts my heart wide open every single time I hear it.

We tried to put him in a big boy bed for one night, but he wasn't ready; he feel asleep and lasted until about 4am, but then slept in our bed. We're going to wait a little while to try again.

He went all day recently without a diaper! Granted, he went potty in his diaper as soon as we put it on, so he's still not ready to go on the potty yet.

Baby on the brain

Since having Gabriel, I've been known to get the itch. No, not that kind of itch, you sick-o; I get a little baby crazy. Until recently, I had been completely content with our one little bunny, but then one Facebook acquaintence friend got pregnant. And another. And then all of a sudden, it was like everyone who had been pregnant during, before or after me (with Gabriel) was now pregnant again.

Maybe I'm just noticing it now because we started trying again in November. Maybe it's because pregnancies go in cycles -- everyone who was having babies with me is now ready for the next one just like we are. All I know is that everywhere I turn, every Facebook profile I look at, I see ultrasounds, little newborn noses and toes, double-lined sticks and smiley faces. Married girls; unmarried girls; first, second and third children.

I know that I shouldn't be jealous, I should be happy for all of the women around me who are so fertile that their husbands could impregnate them from the next room. But I am - and I'm kind of sad, and kind of bitter, and a little unsure. I've been telling friends that it really doesn't matter and that it will happen when it's supposed to, trying to say it so many times that I convince myself. I've told Adrian "it'll happen when it's supposed to" and given it up to God and done all of the things that I'm supposed to do when you're trying to get pregnant and it doesn't happen right away. It still doesn't make me feel better.

Now, I realize that I'm jumping the gun a bit with this whole thing since technically we've only been trying for 3 months, not long in the grand scheme of things. 85% of couples get pregnant within the first year of trying and only about 20% on the first try.

I'm not sure if I've ever talked about fertility on this blog, but one of my biggest fears from before I had Gabriel was that I would try to prevent pregnancy my whole life and then when I really wanted to try, I would be unable to get pregnant. Even though I've had a child already, I'm still scared. The ability to get pregnant is one thing that I think women take for granted during the first quarter or so of their lives, at least I know I have. I've made plans for three, no two, or maybe four kids, who knows? But I've always assumed the number would be higher than one, never thinking that I might not actually possess the ability to carry this so-called plan out. Crazier things have happened.

Either way, I know that my plan will never turn out as I expect it to, whether good or bad. As much as I hate to use the cliche as a mantra, I just have to remember it will happen when it's supposed to (bleh!!).

Team Gonzo

My family has started a weight loss blog if you're interested. You can see it here.

We're all talking about what works for us, sharing motivation, talking about our struggles and trying to keep each other accountable. It's kind of nerdy but you guys might like it.

As for my own weight loss, I'm literally at the same weight I've been for over 8 months. I guess that's a victory in itself, but it's getting old.

I keep re-committing every other day to staying on the WW plan, but unfortunately when a plate of cheesy potato skins smothered in onion and bacon gets put in front of me, I just can't say no.

I can't explain the lack of motivation...HELP MEEEEE!

New Year's Goals - 2011

I love the idea that the new year gives everyone the opportunity to change. There is no clean slate or fresh start, but I personally like to reflect over the prior year and see what things I can do differently. I don't particularly like to use the term "resolution" because I think resolving to do something is so permanent. If I resolve to lose weight with the new year and then get pregnant, that's obviously a null resolution. But if my goal is to get healthier, then no matter when I start or if I gain or lose, I'm still moving towards that goal.

-Finish what I started this April (vague, yes, but many of you know what I'm referring to)
-Get rid of our credit card debt by December 31st, 2011
-Start a savings, no matter how modest it is
-Host Thanksgiving at my house with our entire family
-Get healthier by eating foods that are good for my body and exercising
-Buy a treadmill and use it
-Stop drinking soda
-Paint the outside of our house
-Try to start growing another human being
-Plan a creative and fun party for Gabriel's 2nd birthday at Lions, Tigers, and Bears
-Stop using plastic bags in all forms - zip locks, grocery bags, etc.

What are your goals for the year?

I don't know what the hell I'm doing, part 2 - potty training

My child is growing. He can talk back like nobody's business. He likes to run and jump and play.When he is ready for bed, he tells me "I go night-night."

He knows when he has to go potty...yet doesn't want to do it on the potty. I'm fully aware that there are many different beliefs when it comes to potty training, and I'd like to think that I sway towards the he'll-do-it-when-he's-ready side.

Well, I'm ready for him to go ahead and pee on that potty.

I am so over changing diapers, spending way too much money on them, and making sure we have them stocked in our cars, purses, and houses.

He has some pull-ups that have Buzz on them and is dying to wear them but I've told them that if he wears them, he has to go pee pee on the potty like a big boy.

I have no other bargaining chips, what's my next move?