Oh hey, I'm here! My hair is red, we have two vacations planned and my kids are cute. The end.

I know you guys have been waiting impatiently, desperately, for a post from me (not). I'm so incredibly cool and have lots of important things to say.

Okay, but really. My computer is down and I miss you all and my little space and I can't believe this is the second computer screen that my husband has broken. Oh well, such is life.

So here's an update that will need an update in two weeks because I have things that apparently I'm not "supposed to say in public" yet until April 1st. I know it sounds like we have some big secret but it's really not THAT cool.

Just kidding, it's awesome.

So anyway...life, life, life.

-My boys are adorable, wild little monsters, but that's kind of a given.

...moments after this picture, Jonas slipped off of the bike and face-planted into the concrete. Don't worry, he's got a hard face apparently.

-Remember when I chopped off all of my hair to donate?

...oops, I did it again...

My dad says it looks like a cross between Nicki Minaj and my former college-self. I haven't seen her with red and purple hair yet so I'm going to go ahead and claim that trail blazed. I FEEL LIKE SUCH A LITTLE SASSY-FRASS! It took me a few days and several convincing texts from my bestie that I should keep it but now I think it's here to stay...for a while at least!

-I'm still kicking some Crossfit bootay on the reg. I have become quite addicted and am pretty sure I have convinced Adrian to hop on the bandwagon. He has seen how competitive it is, especially being smack dab in the middle of the Open competition! So far, I've lost 12 pounds with this whole healthy eating and working out business.

Inches have been lost and I'm digging it. I have totally been looking at real bikinis. TO HELL WITH THE TANKINI, Y'ALL!

-We have officially booked our yearly summer week long camping trip and I seriously can't wait. I mean, what's better than beach, booze, and bbbb-family?

It has been so hot out already that it feels like we should be sitting on the beach with a strong cocktail, watching our boys romp around in the sand.

It's too bad we couldn't get it for the week of the Fourth, but whateva! We will have our entire family with us - at least 5 other trailers - and will NOT have a six month old anymore. I know both boys are just going to love it.

-Not this weekend but the following, we are going with Gabriel's best friend's family to the Happiest Place on Earth. He is so excited and everyday he asks me to pull up pictures of Disneyland and all of the characters.

See how little he was the last time we went? Of course my camera decided to "break" the only time we have ever gone, and by break I mean I didn't know how to use it and thought it was broken.

What are you guys up to? What's new? 

PS, are you using Bloglovin to follow along? Apparently that's the cool new thing to do. If you want to keep up-to-date (I swear at some point I will be posting regularly again), go ahead and follow here.

Peace, love, dove and Happy Fifth Day of Spring!

I got a wild hair...

I got up this morning with the intention of getting my hair trimmed. I talked last week about my long hair and how it clogs up the drain every other second. It can be a pain but I just love it, especially when it's wavy because it makes me feel like I could flashback into the 60's with a flower in my hair.

I know I'm weird.

Long hair, don't care!

Anyway, I walked into the salon, sat down in the chair and said, "Look, I just need a trim. Nothing major."

"Sure," she said. "Let me just pull out my scissors and we'll get started."

"Well...wait a second. Alright. My husband loves short hair and I think I want it short. But not really short. Sort of short. Kind of long. You know, like right here?" As I gesture to a place around my nipple line (still, 2 inches...).

"Oh, you want short? What do you think about donating it to Locks of Love? That could be cool?" How did she know I'm a sucker for good causes?

My response, "YES. Let's do that. Chop it off, I'm thinking right below the ears?"

"Um...are you sure? You are not going to have any...regrets? You aren't scared? You just said you wanted two inches off."

"NO. LET'S CUT IT NOW. YES, YES. EXCITED. YES."

And that's how it's done, folks. It took all of thirty seconds to undo the last year and a half of growing. I've had little pangs of regret, but mostly because I want to color it now and thinks it needs a little touching up on the cut. It was Mastercuts, after all. I wouldn't exactly consider them a real "salon," more like a walk-in hackshop.

I took my kids with me and they were ANGELS. I mean seriously, I kept thinking - who are these children and where did my monsters go? Gabriel read books on the iPad while Jonas stared lovingly (read: pick me up immediately, mom, can't you see I'm staring at you?) at me.

I love it. I'm going to have it shortened more because it seems a little long to me, plus accentuate the A-line a bit more. Can't decide on the bangs yet, but I'm thinking hair is going red, y'all.

Honestly, it felt so good to impulsively chop my hair off because this is something I would not have hesitated with in pre-kids. I enjoyed the spontaneity and my hub loves it! Now, I just need to get some wild color in there and then I'll feel great!

Would you chop off your hair randomly like I did? Or do you have an attachment to your locks? Do you like to mix it up or keep it the same?

Some reflections about my FOUR year old

A few days ago, I left some pasta in the car for about ten minutes. Before picking Gabriel up from school, Adrian and I had met up at Olive Garden for a lunch date with Jonas. Gabriel is ALWAYS hungry, so I knew he would want some of my leftovers when he got home. I told him I would go get them from the car and he said, "No mom, it's okay. I'll get them. Can I have your keys please?"

He took the keys from me and walked out of the door as I watched from the window. He clicked the unlock button on the key remote, opened up the car door and grabbed the pasta. He crawled back out, juggling the pasta and keys in one hand while steadying himself with the other.



Out of the blue, my eyes started welling up and I was so overwhelmed by FEELINGS. Lots of feelings that I can't describe. Mostly joy. Pride. Fear. A lot of nostalgia. This moment was so commonplace - so ordinary and uneventful - yet so everything. Here he is, right before my eyes, turning in to this kid, this boy, and I'm afraid that if I blink, my eyes will open and I'll be sitting at his high school graduation.

Once he dropped down from the car, he shut the door, clicked the lock button on the key remote and turned towards the house. As he saw me looking through the window, he smiled and waved. "Hi mom!" He opened up the door and said, "I got it!"

He's this kid who does puzzles on his own, puts his plate in the sink, chooses his outfits and spells his name. He can tell you my phone number and which way right and left point. He knows the way to my parents' and my nana's house and likes to repeat random phrases from movies.

All of these things that I'm so damn proud of but then I just want to say, "Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down, buddy. Let's take our time moving through life. Let's pump the breaks a bit and enjoy the view." I feel like I blinked and here I am, a mother of two, the mother of a FOUR YEAR OLD. WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN.

Today, on his fourth birthday (or rather, the eve, as I sit and write), it's impossible not to sit here and think about the day he made me a mother. Never in my wildest dreams did I have any idea that this 7lb 9oz. bundle of screaming joy would bring me such pleasure and yet, such pain. Pain of the heart. Heartsick. Lovesick.

I remember getting out of surgery, after my C-section, and sitting in the recovery room. It is a requirement at the hospital where I gave birth to enforce the mothers to wait TWO WHOLE HOURS before meeting their babies while they allow the drugs to wear off. And even then? You are at the mercy of the nurses who proceeded to wait another hour to bring him to me.

I sat there in that bed, willing my toes to move, just bend a little, so that I could try to convince them to bring my baby to me. There was nothing in that moment - or any after that he has blessed me with - that I have ever wanted more than to see his face. To touch the soft skin of his cheek. To take a whiff of that addicting new baby smell.

As in life, not every day is perfect. This child is sensitive, strong willed and sometimes just plain out of control. He tests my boundaries not daily, but moment-to-moment.

But that kid.

I keep telling him, "Gabriel, I really need you to just push pause right now and stay three forever." And he looks at me and says, "But Moooooom (like a teenager), I have to get big and grow up just like my Dad!" And then all of a sudden grandbabies and weddings flash before my eyes and I get really dizzy.

Happy birthday, my baby. You are so loved.